1. leander-ligo:

    lordthundercox:

    Yes, it does.

    Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

    (Source: iraffiruse, via sloppyrectum)

     
  2. Freddy Krueger: Fedora

    Other hats in this post: Not fedoras.

    (Source: janesfoster, via everythingsundercontrol)

     
  3. (Source: unclefather, via sloppyrectum)

     
  4. OH!

     

  5. "I ended up driving about 90 mph with one hand on the wheel and the other holding my butt cheeks together as tears streamed down my face."

     
  6. PRETTIES

    (Source: beppski, via toocooltobehipster)

     
  7. (Source: rchand71, via spankmehardbarry)

     
  8. crusherccme:

    found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom

    "Neither does sleep alone."  Dang.

    (via sloppyrectum)

     
  9.  
  10. (Source: tallwhitney, via damn-funny)

     
  11.  
  12. (Source: softsubs, via damn-funny)

     
  13.  
  14. Before I’m 30.

    (Source: zeino-edits, via damn-funny)

     
  15. so… no?

    (Source: ultrafacts, via officialmozzarellastick)